Between Anxiety and Fearlessness: How Do We Deal with Anxiety?

Is the LGBTQ+ community more anxious today than it used to be? In any case, reports of violence and anxiety to the Lumi helpline have increased in 2025. Or has anxiety simply become more visible in a changing society? Antwerp Pride Magazine spoke with three psychologists about anxiety and how we can combat that feeling.

Gert Kruitbosch

Gert is a psychotherapist who works on issues such as gender diversity, neurodiversity, and trauma.

Is there more fear in the LGBTQ+ community today than there used to be?

“When my husband and I walk down the street hand in hand, I feel safe, but he doesn’t. There have always been people who do feel safe on the street. Still, I notice that fear is on the rise these days. Social media is accelerating this trend: when someone is physically threatened, it’s online faster. We hear that something terrible has happened somewhere, but we rarely stop to think: okay, it happened somewhere else, so it’s not here. At the same time, social media helps people who are struggling with a particular gender identity find each other more easily, and that’s a positive thing.”

“You do notice more anxiety in the transgender community these days. The year Bo Van Spilbeeck came out as trans was a great year, but things have gone more downhill since then. Transgender care is being called into question more and more. The influence of far-right religious groups is greater today than it used to be; you can tell they like to stoke fear. Sometimes it’s in the little things, too: for example, a study on the effects of puberty blockers is coming out soon. That’s not a bad thing in itself—you need to know the consequences of what you’re being prescribed. But you feel more pressure these days.”

Do you also notice this growing anxiety in your own practice?

“I see people struggling mainly with their own questions about gender: they’re not sure who they are or how they feel about it. That search is accompanied by fear, but that fear has actually always been there. What will the neighbors think? What will my family say? At the same time, acceptance among young people today is greater than it has ever been, but the backlash against it is more organized. It’s gaining more traction among an older audience.”

Fear is an unpleasant feeling: how should we deal with it?

“Learn to distinguish between what happens to you and what others experience. I know people who no longer go outside because they think it’s dangerous, even though they’ve never experienced anything themselves. They always have a story about someone else. The last time I was yelled at, I flipped them off and kept walking. After all, what could possibly happen? We were standing in the middle of a large square. You can learn self-confidence. It’s in your posture—sometimes literally. And dare to correct someone without taking it personally. Take pronouns, for example: as long as you don’t correct people, you won’t see any change. I regularly correct people without taking it personally, because that, in itself, has nothing to do with me.”

Annalise Delbouille

Annalise is active as a drag creature in the Ghent queer scene and works as a psychologist at Geneeskunde voor het Volk in Zelzate.

Annalise, do you think people are more anxious today than they used to be?

“In and of itself, fear is a healthy reaction to certain social phenomena. Since the COVID-19 crisis, we’ve observed that people are more fearful than they used to be; there are certainly new fears that were much less prevalent in the past. For example, people today are more afraid of losing their benefits in the future, of artificial intelligence taking over their jobs, or of war. We’re seeing a shift further to the right, and queer people are more afraid of becoming victims of hate crimes. At the same time, there’s also a new sense of solidarity—a healthy form of resistance. People are fighting together, taking to the streets, and finding ways to cope with that fear. And that’s a good thing; otherwise, living with fear would be unbearable.”

Many people find it difficult to cope with anxiety. Can we protect ourselves against it?

“The answer is always love! Think about the people you care about and reach out to them; make sure you surround yourself with the right people. Reflect on what you personally need to feel safe. Sometimes that can be very specific: What do I need tonight to get home safely? Do I want to call someone? But despite the new and old threats, what you want most of all is to hear that you’re allowed to exist, that you have a right to exist. You don’t have to conform to heteronormative standards; you’re allowed to just be who you are. And don’t forget: breathing exercises!”

Breathing exercises?

“Focusing on your breath always helps. It helps you relax and find peace in a stressful situation. Slowing down your breathing is your body’s way of telling you to calm down. When you pay attention to it and relax, your body will automatically follow.”

Not everyone manages to see a ray of hope in dark times. Do you see enough hope today?

“I see a lot of hope at an event like Pride, but all kinds of bottom-up initiatives are also emerging that give people hope. New queer safe® spaces are popping up, such as Rokko (a feminist, intersectional coffee shop and bookstore in Ghent). Pride is a protest, but at the same time, it’s an event that takes place only once a year. A safe® space like this is there every day, all year long.”

Katrien Eerdekens

Katrien Eerdekens is a voice therapist and has been working with transgender people in her practice for a long time. She works with professional voice users (singers, actors) who sometimes experience difficulties with their voices and specializes in voices in transition. She is also a co-founder of the Antwerp Queer Choir.

Katrien, should we be more afraid today than we used to be?

“In my practice today, I notice more anxiety than, say, ten years ago. If you ask me, society does seem to have become harsher. At the same time, I also see more courage to be yourself in public, so it’s all very mixed.”

Don't be afraid—how do we do that today?

“Fear is a reaction to something that’s very important to you. For example: being able to be yourself, regardless of gender or sexual orientation, is important to you. That’s why you feel anxious about it. Above all, it shows that you know what’s valuable to you: being yourself and letting others see who you are.”

Can you learn to cope with anxiety?

“That sounds like quite a challenge, but above all, you need to learn to feel secure within yourself. Once you’ve achieved that, you can also learn to cope with the difficulties of the outside world and become more resilient. There are techniques for that, just as voice control is also a technique. It starts with your posture—both literally and figuratively. Someone who stands up straight comes across differently than someone with hunched shoulders. You can learn to face life with courage and project your voice to your audience.”

It probably doesn't help much to tell someone who is anxious that there's no need to be.

“Learning to feel safe and confident happens in small steps. But you can definitely learn it—by expressing what you need, how you feel, and by setting boundaries. So surround yourself with people who make you feel safe and who energize you. Also, don’t be afraid to start a conversation if you feel misunderstood. At the Antwerp Queer Choir, everyone wears a badge with the pronouns they want to be addressed by. It’s a simple solution that helps create a sense of safety.”

“People come to me when their voice doesn’t match their gender identity. ‘Do I come across as masculine, feminine, or neutral enough?’ is a question that often comes up. People are very concerned about how others will react. My main goal is to help people find the courage to speak up. That’s the only way to bring about change, both in your own circle and in society at large.”